An encounter

I am the kind of person who likes to be ahead on things.  This, I have found, can annoy other people.  But, while I often strive to be on top of things and ahead of the game, I still am skilled in the art of procrastinating.  I am procrastinating right now.  Sometimes people procrastinate just to procrastinate, some like the excitement of cutting it close on time, and I am sure there are other reasons why people choose to put off doing things.  My reason is because I hate what I have to do.  This weekend I have been working on things for my teaching license.  I hate this because...

1. It is overwhelming and stressful
2. It is really important
3. It is a lot of work
4. It is slow

And other reasons could be added...primarily what it comes down to is: I am afraid I am going to fail.

College has blessed me in a lot of ways; it has stretched my mind and taught me many things, but something else it has done is taken away a lot of my confidence in my academic ability.  I could coast pretty easily in high school, that has not been the case in a handful of college classes (ahem, MATH).  This started the second half of my freshman year and has carried on to the present, I used to be pretty confident in my mathematics, however, that is not so much the case anymore.  This lack of confidence has fizzled its way into other areas as well...such as paper writing and teaching lessons.  If you combine these two you more or less is get what TPA (Teacher Performance Assessment) is.  I don't think I am doing a good job explaining this...I am working on showing a group of people that I am qualified and capable to teach and should receive a teaching license.  This is being done through lessons I taught and taped, commentaries on the planning and the assessment of the students.  No big deal right?  No.  It seems like a huge deal to me right now.  I feel like I've put forth all this time in college and this one little thing could ruin it all if I fail. 

Which brings me to Jesus.  How?  Well let me share with you...all of this work, work, work and stress, stress, stress trying to earn something.  Without Christ I would continually have to be working and stressing about my salvation and about life after death which is MUCH higher stakes than a teaching license.  But, I do not have to work any more!  I can rest in Christ and the promise I have in Him.  I'm not talking about laziness here, I am talking about confidence and freedom from worry and work and concern.  As a servant of Christ I am free from those things, all I am called to do now is love and follow Him, and in turn love and serve those around me. 

I have been reminded today about Galatians and the freedom that comes through Christ ("It is for freedom that we have been set free").  How sweet.  I read today in John where Jesus speaks to the Samaritan woman about living water "...but whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst.  Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life." (John 4: 13)  And it is true.  I have tasted the living water and I need nothing else.  I am complete it Christ. 

So I guess what I am trying to say is that while I do have to work to complete my teaching license requirements and graduate and a whole slew of other things, I do not have to work for my salvation.  Even if I fail at those things listed, it does not change the fact that I am no longer dead in my sin, but alive in Christ!  What peace that brings.  Striving after things in this world cannot bring you that peace, seeking comfort in other religions will not work.  Only the Prince of Peace can save us from ourselves and give us the hope we so desperately need. 

And so I close with "Hallelujah!  What a savior!  Hallelujah!  What a friend--saving, helping, keeping, loving!  He is with me to the end!"